PAl

Prayer of One who Dissents

Into the deep, I go to You

Unnamed mystery

Untamed

Reality

Who holds all lovingly

The me I think I am

Dissolves in your hand

Unmake my illusions

And give me this day

My daily ungenetically modified bread

Beyond knowing what I need

I ask for your Holy Wisdom Wild Compassion seed

Beyond the hurt and anger

Beyond the lonely path I sometimes tread

I surrender to Your Holy Touch

Even if it seems like for all I try to contribute, it doesn’t matter much

Into Your holy Keeping

I place my prayers

For all to prosper in freedom and peace

For organic ascension and unco-opted cooperation

For the love that is God face to face each one smiling God to the other

Awakening me from all forms of sleeping

Through all this labor

This travail

Even when it seems so many around me continue to flail around

Holding party lines

Narratives so old they smell like moldy bread from an office

Run by a bot who doesn’t need food

God! Help me forgive and move past this mood!

Seeing where rage and resentment are keeping

Sadness weeping

All my soul agreed to

That I, in my human would have never agreed to

Learning to Trust Unconditionally

Even when being human feels so uncomfortable to me

Oh I long for all to be at peace

And free

Oh I long for all to truly feel the sovereign harmony

Instead of co-opted agendas

And attempted hegemony

Follow the money

But don’t stay in the dark

Too long

Find the inner bee

Make the honey

Work as an organic hive

Decline the Borg Mind

Divine Mother

Help keep my heart open to your love

Receptive from above

And from Gaia pristine vitality

Springing up

From the ground

Up front the ground

Resurrection

Of all that Humanity can be

When propaganda no longer separates us

Through falsities good people believe

That keep them rolling up their sleeve

To gaslight

To silence

To shutdown

The conversation

It hurts so bad

But I will not allow it to stop by jubilation

Please help me to remember that those who try to shut me down or silence my dissent

Are still my sister and brother

Help me to learn to love the other

As my own self

And to witness the silence that speaks

Even when it seems no one hears me

Like a voice in algorithm’s forest

Chopped down before my note is read

Or in the coffee shop

A conversation that started in friendship

Until I shared authentically what I think about the vax and the mask

And it became to tensest situation I’ve ever been in outside my family

Instead

Separate me from all that separates me in my mind from you

Give the grace to let go of my baggage and watch it pixilate into nothing

On the screen of life, this dream

Until I can begin anew to dream awake

A world so fresh, so ancient, so new

So full of YOU

Seeing one another afresh

As Soul

As Source

In the flesh

Shower upon all of us in bodies and out of them, all that we need to joyfully

Unglue

From all that has addicted us to shame

To false glories

To trying make a name

Or playing THAT game

Where the pawns are sacrificed

The rooks are hung

The knights traded in strategic maneuvers

That do not behoove us

In our shared Divine Love

Yet in THAT game, only the kings are protected

Whilst the most powerful piece of all, bound by rules of THAT game

Are bound to serve and protect the king unto death

Whilst he cowers and runs away

And his opponent is really just as gay

To have a laugh when knocked over

Because he never is captured or killed

As long as the rules are complied with

So the play can continue while the pawns

The children

Those of talent and promise

Those considered valuable

But not kings

Are disposed of

And on continue the pedophile rings

And so even as I tell about this game

I invite God’s grace to resonate a frequency that sings

That unclenches the board from its hinges

And sends it hurling into space

So that a new sovereign game board of harmony and peace

Can take its place

Where laughter and connection

And abundance for all

With freedom rooted in unity

Is how a win is called

And it’s called in with an open heart

It’s called in with a spirit of plenty

When the game is to see how many

Of us can join our hearts in Aloha Ma

To find the Flourishing

Of our One Universal Ma

In each of our individual Ka

Aloha Ma

Aloha Ma

Aloha Ma

Affirmation

I choose to witness all my feelings with unconditional love

While having compassion, unconditionally for those who mistreat me because they know not what they do

I allow more breath into my body, into the places where I’ve held trauma

And I open my crystalline cellular processes to the healing magic of water

I allow my fire to be cooled

Let off some steam

Let the steam rise to heaven as my prayers for peace, for harmony, for liberation, for kindness, for a joyful, free world where our divinity is recognized and propaganda is a thing of the past, long gone and permanently so.

I bless all those who have helped create the world that has been challenging for me these last years. I forgive them completely, including those whose ideas it was to do this to humanity

I am ready to BEE

And to work collectively to create honey

And a world where harmony and sovereignty are allowed to be

Lovenote

Dear you,

Do you hear it - there is a Love

whispering through the rustle of leaves, the wind, the opening up of all wounds and also the expansion of sky - woundless and ever-wonder some expanse! The wind is whispering that all nature hears your prayers. You are one with life, and life is praying with you for a beautiful, heaven on earth world for all who want it!

Do you see the cicada who leaves one body for another and shows you that the death of one is but a birth into the next form? Do you hear the gentle cicada song in the wind?

Change can be gentle. Change can be difficult. The leaves do not resist changing color. The caterpillar resists become a butterfly. All is well, both when you change is gentle and when it is a bit of a fight. Eventually the caterpillars surrender. And then, on their way to emergence, it is the resistance they meet from their own self-generated cacoon/chrysalis that strengthens their wings so they can fly. The cicada leaves the old to become iridescence. Iridescence ultimately leaves the visible range in its next iteration, and all is well. You too are free to become an

and leave what is no longer you, each you lighter than before. Dear You, Divine Love is the place where you can be wherever you are on scale of gentle or difficult change, one moment or another, and all is well. All is accepted and part of life.

You are loved.

Love,

You

Afterward

I took myself for a walk, after the experience I had with the young woman I thought was my friend in the coffee shop, feeling shaken. I had brought up the issue in relation to my son feeling hesitant to go out into the world, his views being what they are, and policies being a mixed bag. I had expected empathy, even if she also had empathy for other views. I couldn’t believe what I got instead - not only in the abruptness of the absolute shutdown of my own thoughts, but how she felt free to apply hers as if they were facts, in ways that gaslighted my entire experience and my family’s acutely during a 3 year period, and still lingering in various ways.

The secret passage is like therapy for me: I love the bees that loves the plants that live here. I know children walk there on their ways to school, and I love to pray for them and sometimes sing or dance as I walk. The sidewalk that cuts through between houses with no roads, with wild roses and elderberry and other plants piling over the fence the keeps path separate from the yards it borders: the secret not-secret passage where I saw the white roses that inspired the poem, “Are you tucked away in back,” and where once, while I was absorbed in staring at the greenery and sky, and also processing some different difficult things, a man commented, “You really like plants don’t you?” and I commented with hesitation, “I do. I wish I could grow them from my body without CRISPR.”

And then I took myself over to one of my friends who is a safe person for an ugly cry. She was getting ready to go to a festive thing for which she got a sitter, but I told her husband someone was mean to me, and she made time for me. And I ugly cried. She hugged me and told me to keep not fitting in. And another neighbor, who is too busy for regular friendship, but has my same sensibility (she got coerced into the vax and detoxed with homeopathy - and of course, still got the vid,) came over. I told her in shorthand what happened and she said, “Some people are shitheads.” It was quite refreshing, but of course it wasn’t true about the young woman who very unkindly shut me down at the coffee shop. “She is a good person, but she acted like a shithead.” My original friend, the one I had the ugly cry with told me, “Never stop being different. Don’t stop being you Take it from a chameleon. You are making a difference. There is a saying that the most beautiful thing is an old man who plants a young tree. You might never live to see the world you want in your lifetime, but you’re still helping it happen.” I told her that the uniqueness she sees in me is also in her, because she wouldn’t be able to hold space for me if it weren’t. I told her I am fairly incapable of bullshit - hence getting myself into the situation I found myself in in the first place, and that when I say something nice, it’s because I really think/feel/know it’s true. She told me “Thank you but I still don’t believe it.” I hope someday she sees the incredible person she is…and in the mean time, I hope that at the beer tasting she and her husband are at that everyone gets drunk enough to realize how silly propaganda - often psychologically harmful propaganda, that should be outlawed, IMO, is and how silly is everything people fight about, to just decide it all dumb and to embrace peace and tolerance, acceptance, love and friendship of one another, regardless of our beliefs about different things.