Non-attachment: Life lessons from a snuggly dog

My dog Ashlynn has the cutest habit at bedtime: First she asserts her independence. If I show even the slightest preference for where I’d like her to make her nest, she’ll choose another route, often the opposite. I’ve been working on my poker face, as well as my non-attachment. When Ashlynn is sure it isn’t about me anymore, then, in winter, at least, eventually, when she sees me adjust the covers during one of my many wakings (I think I had a five year break from insomnia, but it’s mostly been a lifelong friend since childhood, to varying degrees,) and then she’ll scoot under, curl up into a little ball and edge around her own circle one more time before the cutest little plop.

Ashlynn has one exception to her rule that she does the opposite of what I want her to do: If I am crying, she will either lean in, or in some cases hurl herself half onto my lap, with her belly showing. She will take a break from getting into whatever mischief she can find - to look at me soulfully and offer her full self - furry body for pats - and spirit - that pure puppy soul of innocence and love. She didn’t always do this. This is soul growth in a dog, within one lifetime!

I mus say, I’m impressed.

The day before the Solstice was a rough day for me. In this picture, Ashlynn has successfully brought a smile back to my face, but if you look close enough, you can see I’ve been crying.

It is so important that we who usually show our smile to the world, also honor our tears, which nurture and heal us, like a soothing rain. Tears help detoxify the body and calm our inner being, especially when we hold ourselves in love when we have a cry. It isn’t a sign of illness, but of the ability of yourself to let go of that which, if you held onto it with a rigid smile, or at least a curt nod, would later kill you, or at least make you less able to feel the love, the joy, the freedom, the calm, the peace and the presence you are here to feel!

Tears are a way to stay alive to our own inner being in a world that is out of balance, that is often insane and energetically a wild ride. If we are to allow our resilient inner selves to heal, we have to open ourselves to feel, yet also lighten from that which took us off keel.

We got our son a book of Hafiz poetry for his recent 18th celebration. In the early pages of the introduction, there is mention of Eric Fromms so on point words:

“A person who has not been completely alienated, who has remained sensitive and able to feel, who has not lost the sense of dignity, who is not yet "for sale", who can still suffer over the suffering of others, who has not acquired fully the having mode of existence - briefly, a person who has remained a person and not become a thing - cannot help feeling lonely, powerless, isolated in present-day society. He cannot help doubting himself and his own convictions, if not his sanity. He cannot help suffering, even though he can experience moments of joy and clarity that are absent in the life of his "normal" contemporaries. Not rarely will he suffer from neurosis that results from the situation of a sane man living in an insane society, rather than that of the more conventional neurosis of a sick man trying to adapt himself to a sick society. In the process of going further in his analysis, i.e. of growing to greater independence and productivity,his neurotic symptoms will cure themselves.”

―Erich fromm,The Art of Being

If, instead of remaining alone and powerless, we who may be slightly saner, slightly sooner, through no superiority, but simply time of arrival at this opening to a more divine form of being sane, can be good company for each other, we need not be alone. And when it’s not just one or two of us, but all who feel the inner call, yet maybe have kept their head down, wondering, “Is it time?” “Is it okay to do/be this?” will see that they will find the joy of community in living according our own soul, in a sovereign, creative, inspiring, loving way. We will see the power of a communion of peace lovers, be-ers, joy igniters and delighters!

You who have had to be strong

When the world was so wrong

Bless your tired wings

Let them wash in your tears

Angel, heavy from all yesteryears

Bless the water, the light of heaven

Within the drops from your soul-windowsills fall

Love and Gratitude

For it all

Light shine on your wings dear Angel

Bursting forth from everything that’s tried to strangle

Your breadth of wingspan

Your voice

Your heart-soul-choice

RISE

Winged One

Smile beyond your Tears

Which have helped heal you NOW

SHINE your eternal sparkle

WOW!

This is YOU

TRUE YOU

SKY BLUE

Letting go of last leaves

Smiling open hearted

At all that is

And all that will be

In light

Beyond fright

Everything, Dear Angel, is showing itself

So that all may be might right