Mr Rogers: Look for the Helpers
Conversations about cake, war, peace, connection and humanity
A short drive from my home is a coffee shop owned by a Muslim man. I have had coffee there on and off for ten years. Once I asked Saad, the owner, what inspired him to start his coffee shop. He told me he’d been thinking about getting a home latte maker, but then he saw the space for rent and it just suddenly donned on him, why not open a coffee shop? Not long ago we had a beautiful conversation about connection between people in neighborhoods, about how people started to connect with each other more on the sidewalk during the years when other forms of social interaction were lessened, and that a bright spot was neighbors getting to one one another. I remember the time I met Mr. Rogers. It was the honeymoon of my first, very short and frightening marriage. But the father of my ex knew Mr. Rogers and arranged for us to meet him at his home in the crooked house. He was lovely and gentle and exactly as you would expect. I gave him a copy of Richard Foster’s Streams of Living Water. He gave me a live piano rendition and a collection of small plush toys representing characters from the show. I was a Christian Ministry major in college, and he shared with me that the show was his ministry.
Back in the coffee shop a few months ago, Saad and I had talked about the tendency to, as things went more or less back to normal in the external, for people to go back to their habits of just going in their garages and having their lives boxed off from the physicality of where they live and the people they share the neighborhood with who are also so very human. We talked about the need to build more outdoor spaces designed to nurture connection, the beauty of the community gardens we have seen, and how in spite of some efforts, he felt people were withdrawing more and more into their homes and digital worlds. I said, “Let’s change that!” He replied enthusiastically, “Let’s do it!”
Invitation: What is one thing you could do this week to bring joy, compassion, comfort or upliftment to someone in your physical neighborhood?
What is one step you could take to bring an attitude of peace to your own inner world? How can you better. care for yourself so you be a positive change effector or to bring more beauty that indirectly creates upliftment and peace for those who consciousness it touches?
Okay more story below about an Israeli woman I know who was on the Radio yesterday.
There is a woman in my community who is an Israeli American. She hosts a Radio Show. I met her years ago at an MLK event I attended and we came to mutually appreciate each other. You know those people just know you like each other and value even if your lives don’t intersect super a lot? We haven’t kept in regular touch, esp since I left facebook, but remembers the times we’ve connected well enough that, when she ran into my husband the other day, with all the atrocities in the Holy Land going on, she said to send her love to me.
Yesterday in the morning, when my husband asked where I’d like to go for coffee, I told him, “You pick,” and burst into a mild version of, “I will follow you, wherever you may go,” from Sister Act.
Hubby took us to Saad’s coffee shop. I had a mocha - mostly hot chocolate - and he had a dirty chai. It seemed like a good day for comfort and the almond cake looked delicious, so we splurged and shared a slice. Normally I am gluten-free, but today was an exception. Rules are not there to be rules for rules sake, even the ones we impose on ourselves. As Jesus said and was murdered for, “The Sabbath was made for man, not man for the Sabbath.” Today he might say Human Beings, instead of man, but the principle is the same. Follow the law unless in conflicts with an inner law that is higher and that is essential. Jesus felt that healing was worth breaking the Sabbath over. Okay, that is nothing, nothing, nothing like having wheat-based almond cake when you normally are gluten-free, unless you stretch in like spandex. Which I could, but I won’t. But we’re going to talk about Jesus later in this article, so at least you are primed. I apologize if I’ve also made you hungry for something sweet.
I know Saad is a peace lover, and I imagined he was very sad. He seemed to be holding up pretty well. There is a woman who helps him run the coffee shop and they have a really awesome dynamic in how they work together. I am glad they have each other in that context. I asked Saad if I could give him a hug. “Of course!” He said. Saad knows that I am half Jewish and that I was born in a Sufi commune. He didn’t mind publicly receiving a hug from a woman who is not his neice or grandmother, even though he is devout in his faith. I hugged him and then my hubby and I settled into small table with two chairs in the middle of the shop. Soon we were sipping our drinks from a beautiful round blue and brown mug, while sharing our hearts and minds. I asked hubby if he knew what was going on with current events, as lately we limit the amount we read/watch to focus our attention mostly on what we want to grow, rather than indulging in Tomorrowland style “Monitors.” We don’t have a TV. “They’re talking about it right now,” my husband said.
I cocked my head to listen. I heard a husky voice say, “Well, they want veangence.” I found myself, without much thinking, swiveling in my chair to face them and saying, “We don’t need vengeance. We need Peace.” An older fellow with sparkling blue eyes and white hair said, “I agree.” Another man, a white guy, middle aged said, “Well let’s start now. Can I have a hug?” If I have an icky feeling I may decline a hug, but otherwise, I think hugging strangers is a beautiful thing. So I said, “Absolutely.” I gave him a hug. I didn’t even notice the first guy, the one talking about vengeance walked out. This is a crew of regulars, because I’ve seen then at least three times before, and on one of those occasions the guy who walked out lost his hat and the whole coffee shop was looking for it on his behalf. It turned out he hadn’t brought it along, and it was at home the whole time. This is how we can get all riled up, without really understanding that maybe there is not the problem we think there is. Funnily, my hubby thought the sparkling eyes, white-haired fellow was the one who had lost his hat last time, and brought it up, just after the guy he thought lost his hat complimented my husband’s sweatshirt, which I designed, which says, “Wellbeing for All.” Hubby relished in giving me credit, and we briefly discussed with Mr. Sparkling Eyes-White-Hair how easy it is to design your own sweatshirts, and what ones he could do. After learning that he belongs to a group of Christians who believe in peace, we had a cool, humorous interaction about the Sermon on the Mount. Sparkling eyes twinkling, he said, “What’s that? Nobody knows about THAT…” I’ve quoted a section at the bottom of this post if you’re curious.
For so long - so many centuries - Christians have been conditioned to equate religion with war. More recently the right wing was conditioned to associate Christianity with…right wingism…which used to be the pro-war place to be. But that seems to have switched, as it seems that very few on the left are openly questioning any of the warmongering or its underlying reasons. War was not Jesus’ way. Alot of people wanted it to be Jesus’ way. He might have been more popular if he wanted to have a violent revolution. But he didn’t. He wanted to have a revolution from within. The Kingdom of God is within you. With all this seeking of conquest, what about mastering the kingdom/queendom within?
Yet soon war became the way of the dominant Christian church, as it merged with the state - war against the feminine in the early church, war against anything that questioned the status quo, the orthodoxy, war against anything the church couldn’t control, war against not only the Jews during the Holocaust, nor was it about only Jews and Blacks, but against critical thinkers, homosexuals and against the Roma, also known as the gypsies. The holocaust wasn’t just Germans against Jews. It wasn’t strictly about antisemitism. It was about anything that didn’t conform to a certain ideal. That’s what eugenics, not only in genetics, but also in culture, ideals and expressions of individuality. Lots of nations have stories about believing they are supreme and many cultures have degrees of xenophobia. Many people who are of mixed ethnic background struggle to belong to any one culture because of beliefs in “purity” that don’t belong to one ethnic group alone. My husband who is of mixed ethnicity has had many fascinating discussions around this. I hope soon we can all just appreciate one another and find ways to preserve the distinctive traditions and contributions of cultulres that honed certain qualities, skills, arts or other amazingness in relative isolation, without the belief that this makes them better, and with a dedication to use these contributions to uplift the larger whole. Recently we watched Arrival, which shares a theme with a star trek episode I remember from long ago, the shared theme being humanity needing to bring its different puzzle pieces together to solve the larger whole. I am not talkin about any kind of artificial oneness, but a genuine believe that if we all bring what we contribute to the larger whole, we will be better for it. We will learn from one another and grow more creative, playful and prosperous.
Why are certain groups that have experienced discrimination elevated to protected status worthy of starting a war over while others continue to be marginalized? I feel that the Roma, for example continue to be ignored, while many other groups profit from validation of genuine discrimination. I have experienced fairly extreme anti-semitism, particularly online. Yet I’ve also experienced what I consider persecution for speaking my mind about topics that might lead a criticism of particular Jews that play a powerful and sinister role in world events. I could care less if they’re Jewish - I just want to create a world where everyone prospers in joy and harmony, abundance and freedom - a world built on a deep and abiding understanding that sovereignty and unity are two sides of the same coin otherwise known as reality.
I grew up learning very little about my Jewish heritage on my dad’s side but this: Our whole family lineage was exterminated except for his little branch that made it to the United States. The story has been lost exactly where they lived, but it was an an area in what is now either Ukraine or Poland. They were Jewish, killed by Nazis. Probably including by Ukranian and Polish Nazis and Nazi supporters.
Yet many Roma were also killed in these same regions. And the Roma continue to be marginalized and misunderstood, and often culturally appropropriated in New Age communities when women brand themselves as a gypsy, meaning someone who loves travel and bohemian free spirited life, without referencing the actual Roma (also known as gypsies) and their true and authentic culture. To be inspired by someone’s culture and feel a resonance with it, is in my opinion, fine and awesome, whatever culture you were born into this time around. But I think it’s important to note the authentic culture you are being inspired by rather than just take certain features of it and use it to self-express or brand without honoring its source. It’s like plagarism only of an oppressed, exploited and discriminated against group. Go ahead and quote them, play their music, make their food. Create fusions that blend cultures and taste buds. My husband used to think he was part Spanish. Then someone found out new information and it turned out he is part Italian. Well, I think it is perfectly okay for him and anyone else to have/make Spanish rice on pizza, at least if you don’t have any glucose intolerance issues and the ingredients in them work for your own gut and metabolism. Here the thing: Just don’t brand Spanish Rice Pizza without acknowledging to two cultures that contribute to it! Tell the story, don’t act like it popped out of thin air as “Your thing.” My opinion. It’s in vein the same as honoring elders and not stealing, but in this case it’s individuals working within world culture that has operated based on othering and continues to oppress certain groups, but that also tries to use political correctness to divide people. It’s like - we are all unique expressions of Source, but if you belong to a dominant group and you profit off the art or food of an oppressed group, don’t give the original creator the credit or share the profit, that makes you an asshole, consciously or unconsciously. Of course we have to undo separation consciousness and remember our oneness FIRST as a basis to create cultures that allow and celebrate diversity without othering, and that truly operate from a place of peaceful, thriving co-existence instead of oppression of difference, whether in culture, ethnic history, worldview or lifestyle, subculture or what we accept and decline in our own personal self-determination, as well as within the groups to which we belong. If normal is imposed from the top down, that’s not a healthy state of the human organism as a whole - health is an emergent property, organic and adapative to what the organism is facing. Normative is simply what is done, not what is within a healthy range - which is what we hope is normal, but these days, let’s face it, we are working to heal into a state where that’s true. We can do it. Yet we are a work in progress. That’s okay.
Moving from a chronically ill society or chronic atrocities world to a normal that is a healthy, loving, sovereign, free, joyful, creative and prosperous world for all, free of exploitation and with enough to share from a unity consciousness that naturally leads to care for all - it’s going to be a journey. In the world is going to be a long process. But we can start with our families, by forgiving those who persecute us, while practicing the best self-care we can. We can start locally. It may be the adventure of a lifetime, but did you come for less? The truth is, we are here. Mr. Rogers said after 9/11 to look for the helpers. Don’t look for the helpers outside. Look for the helper inside.
Let’s do this together. We have no guarantees, but what could be a better use of our aliveness than to be fully alive and heal ourselves and one another the best we can, even in extreme times and many uphill battles? Our inner light will be our guide and we will have each other, as every other bright light links up and those who have gone dim, see ours and re-ignite.
When my husband and I came back from coffee, after some good conversation with our son and helping him with some of his homeschooling, we all stood together, listening to Esty’s radio show where she bravely interviewed three individuals speaking on Israel, including a man who barely had a connection from Gaza. I remember when I first met Esty, I was just leaving conventional liberalism, though I still identified as a liberal. She was all afire with anti Trump rhetoric, and I was pointing out that while I’m no fan of Trump, there were some other important things going on that weren’t getting attention. I think I mentioned some concerns I had about Bill Barr, for example. These days I spend less time on politics and more time living life one day at a time in the best way I can and being an open vessel for Source and synchronicity. When I heard Esty on the radio, I was in awe. She was a divine feminine voice - calm, compassionate, asking really good questions, listening, holding space for something so big and awful yet with an open heart, with a stillness in the storm. She shared her story from a place of love and authentic wisdom, point out how Jewish Trauma around the Holocaust and before that pograms, has such a deep place in the Israeli psyche that fear is driving it to survive and prevail at all costs, and how we have to begin to heal this wound, and how her own personal journey of healing led her to this insight. She directly called out the specific atrocities of both Hamas and Israel, and the lead up in terms of Israel ignoring the human rights pleas of many Watch Dog groups to the plight of Palestinians. Why are we in Ukraine but we are not fighting for Tibet, I have always wondered. Human Rights groups in the holy are being labeled terrorists and while the actual Nazis - those in Asov’s battallion are funded, whitewashed and told to start doing a better job virtue signaling. In times of war, being a good person can threaten the war effort. Being a person of conscience is dangerous. That’s why so many don’t speak up. Sophie Scholl lost her life for it in Germany. So did Dietrich Bonhoffer. On the other hand Corrie Ten Boom didn’t lose her life for standing in her conscience, hiding Jews in her home during the Holocaust. Viktor Frankl made it and wrote a powerful treatise shortly after his time in a concentration camp called, whose heartbeat is YES TO LIFE. He went on to publish Man’s Search For Meaning, which is one of my all-time favorite books. Vera Sherav trusted her intuition and refused to board a doomed boat she was told to get on. It saved her life And she is still here with us, speaking Truth.Yet why are people less scared to throw throw themselves in harms way to be an agent of death than to stand in the vulnerability of standing for peace? Would you not rather live or die knowing you did what was True in Your Inner High Heart than throw yourself and the world into violence with at least as high a likelihood of death and no chance of a solution that gets at the root of it and begins the True Healing Process?
We can begin that True Healing Process even while the world has gone mad. We can do this by doing our own inner work. We can do this by learning how to function in a way that lends itself to all-way-win solutions even in the greatest challenges of our personal and community lives, locally. We can do this by celebrating the Heroes. Heroes like the brave man from Gaza.
Let’s co-create, align and surrender beyond the need to control an outcome
By celebrating people like Esty and Saad and the Sparkling Eyes White Haired Guy and Brave man who phoned in from Gaza. The beautiful souls who refuse to enemize or demonize regular people just because a few people with too many power have controlled the world for so long. Freedom begins with compassion. Freedom begins with a truth that refuses to ignore one truth in support or another.
The Beatitudes
2 And he opened his mouth and taught them, saying:
3 “Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
4 “Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted.
5 “Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth.
6 “Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they shall be satisfied.
7 “Blessed are the merciful, for they shall receive mercy.
8 “Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God.
9 “Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons[a] of God.
10 “Blessed are those who are persecuted for righteousness' sake, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
11 “Blessed are you when others revile you and persecute you and utter all kinds of evil against you falsely on my account. 12 Rejoice and be glad, for your reward is great in heaven, for so they persecuted the prophets who were before you.
Salt and Light
13 “You are the salt of the earth, but if salt has lost its taste, how shall its saltiness be restored? It is no longer good for anything except to be thrown out and trampled under people's feet.
14 “You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden. 15 Nor do people light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on a stand, and it gives light to all in the house. 16 In the same way, let your light shine before others, so that[b] they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in heaven.
~https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Matthew%205-7&version=ESV
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